Attempts to flatten the curve on the spread of the Corona virus have many parents and children at home together all day every day; school has been cancelled, daycare centers are closed and parents are working from home. While we are all doing our part by practicing social distancing, some might find that this 24-7 ‘social togetherness’ is a bit much!
When my kids were young I schooled them at home, so every day was an exercise in being up close and personal. I am not going to tell you that it is easy, but there are actions you can take to make this time smoother. Here are my top tips:
Routines are important
I am a random creative person by nature and I rarely have a routine for anything, but as an early childhood educator I found out right away that children need routines! Knowing what comes next calms the mind and helps them settle into activities. I encourage you to post the day’s schedule so that you can defer to it; i.e. the schedule is making the rules, not you! Here is an example:
Child: I want to play games on the computer!
Parent: Let’s check the schedule. Oh, it looks like we’ve got outside time, then lunch and chores, and after that is computer time.
Child: okay! I’m going to play outside! (Let’s be real here. The child will stomp away mad or do a little high-level whining! Schedules and routines aren’t magic, but you should stick to your plan and be consistent.)
In order to get more cooperation you can work as a team to build your schedule together. While it is good to include in your schedule activities that are important to your child, it is also imperative to put time in your schedule for things that are important to you, the household, and the community. Also include in your schedule time to do nothing which leads us to…
Being bored is okay!
Just like any other skill, learning how to just ‘be’ takes practice. I did an experiment when my kids were little where they didn’t watch TV for 5 years. The first few months were terrible, as they didn’t really know how to keep themselves busy. But after spending time feeling bored, they began to find ways to fill their time and through this practice developed some lifelong skills and interests.
We don’t know how long this Corona virus isolation will last, so you may not have the time to let this process evolve naturally. Whenever your kids utter the words, ‘I’m bored!’, encourage them to create a list of ideas that might keep their brains busy. Here are a few to start:
- Drawing, painting and other fine arts
- Building with Legos or other materials
- Writing stories or plays or letters
- Physical challenges: push ups, running, yoga
- Rearranging their room, or organizing their belongings
- Calling or messaging a family member who is isolated
Being bored isn’t the end of the world, and you as a parent are NOT responsible for keeping your children entertained 24-7. Don’t let their whining manipulate you into feeling guilty! Just reassure them and say, ‘I have confidence in you. You will think of something to stay busy!’
Work Beside Each Other
The goal of every parent should be to work themselves out of a job. Each year, children should be gaining more independence and learning how to take care of their own needs. As I mentioned, I am by nature very random and I was never able to make a ‘chore chart’ work. I just lacked the ability to supervise and enforce and follow up on the list to make sure everything was done. I found a solution that worked for me, maybe it will work for you!
I used the work that needed to be done around the house as an opportunity to connect and chat with my kids. When I was unloading the dishwasher, I never did it alone, I always invited one of my kids to share in the task with me. During this time we would visit and catch up with each other’s lives. If I was vacuuming, we made it a team sport and I would have them scoot furniture around or move throw rugs to support the process.
There are so many small little tasks that are involved in running a healthy safe household. There is no reason that this work should fall to one member of the family! Children have the ability to contribute, and it builds their confidence to know that they have actual valuable skills. To this day, my kids and I work very well alongside each other and enjoy each other’s company so I would say this method paid off!
It Won’t Be Perfect
It took years for our family to learn how to live and work together 24-7, and honestly it was never easy. Humans are complex social creatures, and it takes a lot of practice to learn how to negotiate, self-motivate, respect others’ space, and just be. During this Corona Virus crisis, we have all been thrown out of our usual routines, and anxiety is running high. Being home together feels difficult because it is difficult! Give yourself some grace, and don’t feel like you have to do things perfectly.
Hang in there! We will get through this. Follow me on Facebook for fun ideas to do STEM activities at home 🙂
0 Comments